Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Testimonies...

I have had a number of "God moments" in Guatemala on my trips. I've already related the very real story of the baby being healed, which was a life altering experience for me, in a spiritual sense. I had another experience, that while not as spectacular, was just as life altering, and much more personal. It happened on my first trip to Guatemala. When we were preparing to go, our Pastor told us to each prepare a testimony to share in the local churches. Now, you have to understand, I am deathly afraid of speaking in front of people. It terrifies me, a lot. So I was not too terribly enthused about the idea, but I threw something together about coming to Christ, you know, the standard fare, short, easy and quick. Well, once we were down there working, testimonies were quickly forgotten about. Then, I believe, it on was Saturday, David told us we were going to go to one of the prisons that he ministered at. And not only were we visiting, but we would be giving our testimonies. Now, the thought of giving a testimony was bad enough, but to have to do it in a prison was more than I could take. Just the thought of walking in, and having the doors locked behind us was teriffying. And to top it all off, I realized the testimony I had prepared would not be appropriate for this particular "audience." So I quickly began to try to put together a new testimony, even as we were driving. When we finally arrived at the prison, I was a nervous wreck. It took all I had to walk through those doors, and into the prison itself. I was even more nervous as I looked around, and noticed that there were very few guards. "Who is going to protect us" I thought to myself. They led us up to a large meeting room, where we waited as they went to get the men. Actually, most were boys, really, being aound 16 or 17 years of age, although some were in their 20's. Some were there simply for being homeless, while others were there for crimes as serious as murder. Hearing this did nothing to ease my anxiety. When everyone was assembled, we began. I was the third person to speak. I really did not have much put together to say, and I didn't know how I was going to get through it. I remember walking to the front, looking at the translator, and wishing I could run and hide. Instead, I closed my eyes and said a quick prayer. Then I began speaking. What happened next amazes me to this day. First, the nervouness disappeared. Second, where I had no idea what to say before, now the words just began flowing out of me. Then the thing that has stayed with me the most happened. I looked out at the men I was speaking to, and I could see it in their eyes; they were listening to me! Not only that, they were really interested, transfixed, on what I was saying. The words and emotions really began to pour out of then, and before I knew it, I was finished. As I sat down to applause, I felt good. It wasn't until later that I realized that perhaps my words had changed someones life, or at least made them think. Then it dawned on me. I remembered my prayer, the calm, and how the words flowed, and I realized; it wasn't me. It was the power of the Holy Spiritcalmed me, that enabled me to get up there and talk, and it was the Holy Spirit that gave me the words speak. I was merely a vessel. This lesson awoke in me a passion for sharing. I still am terrified in front of groups, but by praying, and turning it over to God, I have found it to be not only enjoyable, but spiritually uplifting also. I try to use the same approach on this blog, posting as I feel the Spirit lead me, for without the Spirit, my words are empty. So my prayer for myself, and each of you, is that we may all be filled with the Spirit, and that we may do as we are being led. God bless all of you, Ken

5 Comments:

At 11:12 AM, Blogger HeyJules said...

Thank you for sharing that, Ken. I have been putting off writing my testimony for far too long and this was just what I needed to hear to get refocused again.

Thank you.

 
At 3:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Keep on praying and letting the Spirit lead! I am always uplifted when I come over to visit.

Thanks for your transparency here. You continue to touch lives. :)

 
At 12:11 PM, Blogger Shalee said...

Ken, this is reminding me of when Jesus tells his followers to not worry about what they will say because the Holy Spirit will give them the words at the right time.

Thanks for sharing another way that God is at work in you.

 
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